— Your Alocasia, probably.
This thick, structured tee carries the iconic words of every high-maintenance, high-reward plant we love anyway. With its soft, lived-in feel and rich pigment-dyed finish, this shirt wears like it’s already been in your lineup for years — just like that Alocasia that’s still throwing attitude despite the humidifier, grow light, and weekly pep talks.
Printed with a full-color illustration and a plant collector’s sense of humor, this one’s for the growers who know: it’s not drama... it’s specificity.
• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
• Garment-dyed
• Relaxed fit
• 7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems
• Blank product sourced from Honduras
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
This thick, structured tee carries the iconic words of every high-maintenance, high-reward plant we love anyway. With its soft, lived-in feel and rich pigment-dyed finish, this shirt wears like it’s already been in your lineup for years — just like that Alocasia that’s still throwing attitude despite the humidifier, grow light, and weekly pep talks.
Printed with a full-color illustration and a plant collector’s sense of humor, this one’s for the growers who know: it’s not drama... it’s specificity.
• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
• Garment-dyed
• Relaxed fit
• 7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems
• Blank product sourced from Honduras
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Size guide
| WIDTH (inches) | LENGTH (inches) | SLEEVE CENTER BACK (inches) | |
| S | 18 ¼ | 26 ⅝ | 16 ¼ |
| M | 20 ¼ | 28 | 17 ¾ |
| L | 22 | 29 ⅜ | 19 |
| XL | 24 | 30 ¾ | 20 ½ |
| 2XL | 26 | 31 ⅝ | 21 ¾ |
| 3XL | 27 ¾ | 32 ½ | 23 ¼ |
| 4XL | 29 ¾ | 33 ½ | 24 ⅝ |
I'm Not Dramatic. I'm Specific. - Heavyweight Tee
Our Live Delivery Guarantee
We stand behind every leaf and every mite. If your plant or predatory insects don’t arrive alive on the first delivery attempt, we’ll make it right.
Here’s what you need to know:
- Email us at info@fgmnnursery.com within 24 hours of delivery
- Include clear photos of the item and the shipping label
- Someone must be available to receive the package—plants and bugs don’t do well sitting in the sun, a mailbox, or the back of a delivery truck
For plants, we offer store credit if something goes wrong.
For predatory mites and beneficial insects, you’ll have the choice of a replacement shipment or store credit.
If you contact us after the 24-hour window, we may still be able to help—just know it’s handled case by case.
We pack with care, insulate when needed, and check the weather before shipping. But once it’s in transit, the fastest way to protect your order is to open it right away.